Week #3: 5 Great Outdoor Activities that Encourage us to Play with Our Kids

When we were still living in South Africa, I bought a life-saving book, written by Dawn Isaac, titled “101 Things For Kids To Do Outside“. Not only did this book offer us ideas for hours of fun and constructive activities, it also saved my life (read sanity) during those LONG holidays.

Now we’re in the twilight of our first Michigan Winter – worlds apart from where we were a year ago! And I must confess that I cannot wait for the snow to melt and the newness of Spring to arrive… So we can again get down and do some of the “101 things for kids to do outside“. There are so many great ideas in this book, but I’ve decided to share my 5 favorite ones with you:

1. A “Potion” Lab

A Potion Lab

This is such an exciting playtime activity. Set up a table in your garden, with a waterproof table cloth. You will need many containers of different shapes and sizes. A funnel, jugs, tweezers, anything that might be found (and is safe) in a science lab. As Dawn writes… “After all dragon’s blood and giant’s snot call for some very careful handling”.

Next is food coloring mixed with water, and for a fizzy experience add some bicarbonate of soda before splashing in a little vinegar. She also suggests a few more exciting ingredients, such as: glitter, poster paint, flour, rice and vegetable oil, (give these some creative names ie: unicorn tears, etc.).

The possibilities are endless :)

2. Rustle up a Bird Feast

Bird Feast

I love this idea for Spring and Summer. One sure way to get the birds into your garden!

You will need: cut-off branches, large plant pot, bricks or stones, soil or sand, garden wire, unsalted and un-buttered popcorn, apples, orange halves, lard (rendered fat), flour, oats and birdseed.

If you don’t have a large tree to hang your creations from, you can build your own tree using the plant pot, sand, cut off branches and bricks. Use unsalted and un-buttered popcorn and thread onto the garden wire to make “nibble rings”. You can also thread apple slices onto the garden wire for a fruity treat. Slice up the oranges into rings, make a mixture out of the lard, flour, oats and birdseed fill the rings  and thread onto the wire (exact proportions in the book).

You can hang these from your made tree or from a tree in your garden. Colorful and pretty!

3. Setting Up Camp

Setting Up Camp

I cannot wait to get camping! Our kids are finally at the age where they can appreciate what it’s all about! I think making the frame is the most difficult, but once it is done you can throw over any blanket and decorate to your own desire. You can lay a blanket down on the floor inside, pack a picnic and whala!

4. Create a Paving Stone Gallery

Paving Art

I’ve been doing this with my kids since they could hold a piece of chalk! I think people would see our driveway as a collection of beautiful artworks! The possibilities here are endless. You could use chalk, powder paint, homemade paint and brushes. Let the creative juices flow! The best part about this activity is that you can hose it down when done… I choose to let the artwork linger!

5. Last but not least “Start a mini vegetable garden”

Garden

This is just gorgeous! Nothing like planting seeds, letting our children watch them grow and then EAT the Produce!! You can prettify or separate the garden by adding seashells or stones. You can use an old bucket, wheelbarrow, wooden crate or baby bath! The kids just love getting dirty!

OKAY!

I just HAVE to add one more favorite! This is for my youngest son! He is OBSESSED with wildlife, especially lions!

6. Building a mini Rockery!

Rock Garden

Collect some rocks, stones, and green vegetation… then build a little rockery structure in the corner of  your garden. Bring out some animals and there you have it! You can change this to a fairy garden, etc!

HOURS OF PLAY AHEAD!

I hope you enjoyed this post, I, for one, am feeling really positive about Spring! If you have any new ideas please comment below!

There is nothing more therapeutic than getting outdoors, with the sun on your skin! It is definitely a must when you are a mama! Once the kids are into their activities and you have spent some one on one time with them, you can sit and watch them play with a cuppa tea or a glass of wine!  Your choice, your delight!

Dawn has activities for every season, she has written a second book “101 Things For Kids To Do On a Rainy Day”

Some rules:

Always ask an adult
Never eat what you make…
All photo’s and ideas credited to Dawn Isaac, Will Heap (Photography), and the book: “101 Things For Kids To Do Outside”. #LOVE  http://www.amazon.com/dp/1770857117/.

Please visit Dawn’s website  http://www.dawn-isaac.com/

With love

One Messy Mama

x

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How to deal with tantrums? My experience with a toddler of almost 3 years.

Tantrums on toddlers? Do I have to let him calm down?

Recently I have read a scientific study about tantrums and how to deal with them on a toddler. And I have found out, that it is very important to leave your kid to calm down, then to ask him about his tantrums and to let him/her express his/her feelings.

All of us, for sure, have passed through such uncontrollable emotions of our toddlers and didn't know how to manage such comportament. So my questions always was, do I have to act immediately when my kid begins tantrums or it is better to leave him to cry a little bit then to act? In this study from Emotions Magazine, describes that the most effective strategy is to leave him cry few seconds or minutes and only then to act, because there are different phases of their tantrums, and depends on the phase phasethe tantrum is, you as a parent can control or not his emotions.

Here we go with the phases:

Phase 1. It is a crisis phase, when a toddler has a complex of emotions (rage, sadness, anguish and search of consolation), this means that he feels like nobody is understanding him. That is why, at this step it is preferable to ¨ignore¨ him, till he is open for consolation. A tantrum is a form of expression of a feeling that our kid is not able to control or to express in a right way. The idea at this phase it not to center on his tantrum, but to find patience within us to find the real reason of what have made our kid to feel bad.

Phase 2. Our kid begins to calm down, he is pretty open for consolation, now, it is the perfect moment for mum&dad to find what have caused such comportment on our kid. Ask questions and help your toddler to express his real feeling. This can be the feeling of less attention (this happens to me mostly of the times after a long working day and I pay less attention to my kid), or any other jealousy.

Phase 3. You have to discuss with your toddler and explain that either of his strange feeling he will be understood by mum or dad, and that is not necessary to create a tantrum . And that every problem has a solution, and it is absolutely normal to have the feeling that happens inside him.

Conclusion. It is better not to interrupt a tantrum. After making a study on 1300 toddlers of age of 2s and 3s, there is a scheme of a tantrum which is characterized with shrieking, shouting, crying, lament and whining. Last 2 help to calm down our kid, while first 2 are when the tantrum begins and it is better to leave toddler to pass first 2 and then to begin consolation.

This post is very theoretical, I know, as in reality it is very complicated to resist to all the tantrums. I think that I am a lucky mum and I had few of them, and believe me I know how horrible it is. You feel like no way to calm down the toddler and you feel helpless. I am very happy that I have found this study, because it helped me understand how to manage a tantrum on my toddler. I hope you will find it useful as well.

P.S. For various reasons I do not like to make images of my kid while he is crying, that is why I share with you a cute image of my kid :)

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Week #2. Tips for flying with babies.

Happy to announce that this project continues with another wonderful blogpost and today I have as a guest Sarah from tammymum. A great mum who shares with us her experience and tips for flying with babies.

Having recently embarked on air travel with an 18 month old and a 7 month old I have decided to write down all the things that helped get us through our 4 hour flight. I'm not saying it'll solve everyone's travel woes but it may help you out at a time in need, and I must say both my babies were fab on the flight, much better than I expected.

1. Entertainment. This is a difficult one for babies I find as they imageare hard to entertain, especially the when they are at that awkward age between the just sitting and staring at everything age and the able to sit contently in front a film age. For my little one I took a trunki packed with stuff. We had books, wooden puzzles, paper and pens, a plastic teapot and cup, her 'baba' (bedtime bunny thing) and of course my iPad. I downloaded her favourite CBeebies programs, such as In the night garden (which is 25 minutes...amazing)  Rah Rah the noisey lion, Bing etc. I also downloaded a couple of apps, such as the In the night garden app. That being said her favourite thing to do on the iPad was to flick through photos. None of these things held her attention for an hour in any one stretch but they did help to occupy and pacify her. Keeping her quite and calm.

2. Food. I took plenty, we also had an in flight meal. No shame here, it kept everyone happy...and quiet.

3. Bottles. For take of and landing it can be worth giving your little ones a bottle or allowing them to nurse. The sucking helps the pressure on there ears and can help to reduce the pain. It's not uncommon for us adults to suck on a boiled sweet after all.

4. Don't be afraid to get up. don't get me wrong we weren't a yo yo but baby 1 and I did on occasion get up to stretch our legs. It served as a good distraction for her (and me) and helped kill some time. I also found the majority of people would happily fuss over her as she walked down the isle.

5. Flight times. This isn't always possible but where it is I would recommend thinking about the flight time you book. We deliberately booked an early morning flight on the way out in the hope the little ones would have a nap on the flight after the earlier than normal start - which they did. On our way home we had a later flight about 1.30pm our 18 month old didn't sleep prior to the flight so she was ready for a nap during. By some miracle it worked. I must admit though there was about 10 minutes of fussing and crying as she got herself off to sleep. But 10 minutes in 4 hours - I'll take that!

6. Strength in numbers. Again this isn't always possible but if it is, embrace it fully. On our outbound flight we took Nanny and Grandad. We outnumbered the babies 2 to 1 and it was brilliant. We could take shifts and relieve the pressure on each other. For the inbound flight it was only Mr TM myself and my Nan, but still the extra body was a godsend. That being said our next flight will probably just be the 2 of us but we are feeling more confident now to tackle it by ourselves.

7. Ignore the tutting. We did get some disapproving looks from other passengers - how dare we be on their flight, and I did hear of some complaints from passengers in respect of a couple of the other babies and toddlers that were on the flight. I was conscious to keep baby related disturbances to a minimum but ultimately, it's a few hours out of everyone's lives and is that such a big deal in the grand scheme of things?  One of the cabin crew members who I got talking to said she was used to passengers moaning at her about babies and kids on flights but she quite rightly pointed out, the majority of these people have themselves had little ones, or their children or grandchildren do and at some point they will have been faced with a discontented baby they are struggling to settle whilst under the watchful eye of others, they have simply forgot what it is like. They were once the ones facing the tuts and grumbles and groans from bystanders, the boot just happens to be on the other foot now. So I simply wouldn't worry about it. It will come to and end and everyone will forget about it.

8. Try to enjoy it. Potentially easiesr said than done granted, but the babies are more relaxed if you are (so we are told) and if you are off on your holidays, visiting friends, family whatever you are doing you are creating a memory. I will always remember my little ones face as we took off and look forward to telling her and her brother all about how their travelling escapades started so young and what they were like. Admittedly this only works if you have a memory you don't want to forget...


So it's not the golden ticket but hopefully there's a few tips in there that will be the key to a happy mamma when flying with babies.


Sarah from tammymum.com

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Week #1: 5 Tips for introducing a new sibling to toddlers and preschoolers

Welcome to week´s #1 post from #happymamasecrets project.

Today´s invitee is Harriet from Toby & Roo and her super cute kids. Feel free to share and comment. I, personally enjoyed reading her article.

Introducing a new sibling to our family is something I was so worried about, especially as Reuben, who is nearly 4 years old and very aware of what is taking place around him, seemed to be really anxious about baby’s arrival. He was very excited, don’t get me wrong, but he was also very clingy, possessive and nervous of being left anywhere – even though he’d been to preschool, Grandma’s house, wherever so many times before. Toby, on the other hand, seemed to be in sweet oblivion, he’s only just 2 years old so doesn’t really have much of a concept, we felt like maybe he would feel pushed out or like he wasn’t the ‘special’ baby anymore. I was unsure what he would make of me breast-feeding baby, especially as he was breast fed… would he be jealous? We spent a tonne of time before baby was due, planning out what to do to help everything go smoothly and make sure that no one feels pushed out.

I thought it might be helpful to put together a little list of things that we did to help introduce older siblings to the new arrival, so here goes, good luck!

• Talk, talk and talk some more

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Talking is possibly the most important thing you can do for helping to prepare your children for the new changes they are about to face, and I found it was just as important for after baby is here. During my pregnancy I talked to the boys about everything, in fact I wrote about that here , and it seemed natural to me to continue after my baby was born. Question’s like ‘How did baby get out of your belly?’, ‘Why is baby eating your boobie?’, ‘Why can’t I come with you and Edie?’ are a few of the ones we have had so far and I can honestly say, for us, they have been a blessing – the boy’s (Reuben mostly) feel more involved if their questions are answered. I have also found that honesty is the best policy – ‘Baby was born when mummy went to the hospital, she moved down what’s called a birth canal and then arrived into the world’, ‘Baby doesn’t eat Mummy’s boobie, she is drinking milk that comes from mummy’s boobie’ and ‘Baby has to stay with Mummy at all times because she can only drink from Mummy’s boobie, no one else has her special milk, so she has to stay with me. When she is a big girl like you, she will be able to stay with Daddy or Maw Maw’ are just some of the answers we have chosen to give. Honest, but without too much detail! Basically what I’m saying is, no matter how tired you are, how touched out or fed up you’re feeling, don’t deflect the many, many questions that will come your way. Answer them, as best you can, and that will help.

• Ask for help, not just from Daddy or other adults

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I’m really surprised by how much I have found this to be helpful in integrating Edith into our family and making the boys feel really happy and special in themselves. I ask both the boys to help me with little things like fetching me a nappy, picking up a packet of wipes or passing me muslin squares while I’m feeding. This has been especially helpful with Toby – Reuben is at the age where he is super helpful when he wants but if not, he won’t bother – but Toby loves to pick up little bits and bobs, it makes him feel really useful and helpful (which he of course is!) but, most importantly, it makes him feel involved.

• Ask visitors to be thoughtful

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Imagine every time your extended family members come to visit you there are cuddles and kisses, often toys or treats and then suddenly this new thing, this usurper, comes in, and you aren’t even the first person they say hello to anymore, the gifts aren’t for you, the treats aren’t for you and the kisses and cuddles are being showered on someone else. That would piss you off, right? You would probably feel like acting out for attention, but you wouldn’t, because you’re an adult and can control your emotions, but your child might not be able to. Before family members and friends come over to meet baby for the first time, make sure they know that you need them to think of your other children first. Things like making sure that they say hi to your kids first (this is actually the most common ‘mistake’ people don’t say hi, it’s surplus to requirements and they forget), then any kisses and cuddles that would normally happen should still go ahead, and finally, ask the children to show off their new sibling, ask their permission to hold the new sibling etc etc – involve them as much as possible. I know the temptation to just default to the new parents, ask about the labor, ask questions, congratulate etc is really strong, but make sure visitors know that the most important thing is to involve the kids and treat them as normal.

• Bring the kids something they have been really desperate for from baby

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We did this both times we had have had a baby, and each time it has been really effective and something that has had the desired effect. For weeks (maybe even longer!) Reuben has been begging us for a special toy that he was in love with, we have been telling him that he has to wait until his birthday, however the day that we brought Edith home, we brought him his special toy and told him that his new baby sister brought it for him because she loves him and wanted to bring him something special. We obviously did the same for Toby, he doesn’t quite get it so much, however it still put a big smile on his face!

• Make time

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It’s the most simple one to say, but the hardest one to actually do. This is something that requires work and is going to be a learning curve for everyone – you, Daddy, the kids and the baby. I find that bath times are a really good way to spend some time as a family. I get in the bath tub (or sometimes shower) with Edith and the boys come in with us, Daddy helps by getting everyone dry and sorting out pjs. It’s a way to make ‘family time’ everyday. On top of that, when the baby is sleeping, you can do simple things like read a book with the kids, bake or even set them up to paint. It’s the only way to enjoy time together, but don’t push yourself too hard!

So there you have it, this is how we have integrated our new arrival into the home, I’d love to know if you have anything to add, we could get a lot of ?

Harriet x

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For all mommies bloggers

*****This post is dedicated to all mums bloggers*****

I have thought a lot how to write this post and how to manage all the ideas into one post. To write a long story short. I want to launch a new project on my blog, where other mums could share theirs experience and their thoughts of motherhood. The main idea is to share thoughts and ideas to be a mum, as well to get more views with making shares of the posts.

What will you get from that?

- a new link to your website
- your post will be shared on my facebook page, twitter page, pinterest page
- your blog will be promoted as well on all my socials

Rules:

- provide an interesting post about: toddler activities, babies activities, travel experience with toddlers, any ideas you think will be interesting for other mums
-provide a great picture, at least one, how many you want
- share your post on my blog on your socials

Posts can be either recently written or that have been already written on your post (If these were already written, please, provide as well link to your web)

How do you think, would you like to participate?

Use hashtag #happymamasecrets or happymamasecrets@gmail.com to show me your articles.

If your article is chosen then it will be published on Wednesday. You can participate as many times as you want.

Thank you!

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